Dr. Chris

Growing up as the son of Thomas was never particularly easy. The family forge was a place of relentless hammering, blistering heat, and a father who considered a twelve-hour working day a pleasant afternoon.

While his brother Eddie inherited the family's passion for metalworking, Chris became fascinated by the rather unfortunate people who arrived at the forge looking for replacement fingers, treatment for burns, or explanations for why their armour had suddenly become part of their anatomy.

Eventually, Chris came to a startling conclusion.

Someone in this family ought to learn how to put people back together.

And so, while Eddie became an armourer, Chris devoted himself to medicine.

Years later, the brothers developed what Dr Chris describes as "a remarkably efficient professional relationship."

Eddie sells adventurers weapons and armour. Adventurers venture into the wilderness. Adventurers return with alarming injuries. Dr Chris treats them.

Occasionally, they return to Eddie to purchase better equipment, and the entire process begins again.

Chris insists that this is merely a coincidence.

His medical practice has also taught him the importance of patience, compassion, and maintaining a straight face while a heavily armoured warrior explains how he lost a fight against a cow.

Despite his formidable intellect and tendency to deliver unsolicited medical lectures, Chris genuinely cares about his patients. He has treated countless adventurers, often asking for nothing more than that they follow his advice.

Most do not.

His father remains proud of him, although Thomas occasionally remarks that medicine would be considerably simpler if everyone were made of iron.

Chris has attempted to explain that this is not how anatomy works.

Thomas remains unconvinced.

• A family of specialists. Thomas makes the weapons, Eddie sells the armour, and Dr Chris treats anyone who fails to use either correctly. Chris insists that this arrangement was not planned.

• An unfortunate family history. Chris's cousins, Ed and Edd, have provided him with more opportunities to practise medicine than he cares to remember. Neither has ever admitted to being the cause of the other's injuries.

• A matter of professional pride. Dr Chris maintains that medicine is considerably more sophisticated than smithing. Thomas has challenged him to forge a functioning kneecap.

• The brotherly discount. Eddie has repeatedly suggested that Chris offer discounted treatment to customers of Eddie's Arms & Armour. Chris replied that he would consider it when Eddie started including medical insurance with every sword.

• Medical terminology. Chris has a complicated medical explanation for almost every injury. Most adventurers simply prefer to hear whether they're going to survive.

• Thomas - Chris's father, a renowned blacksmith who believes most problems can be solved with a hammer.
• Eddie - His brother, an armourer whose customers frequently become Chris's patients.
• Ed - His cousin and an occasional source of professional concern.
• Edd - His other cousin, whose medical history Chris refuses to discuss.
• Cow - Responsible for at least one deeply embarrassing conversation in Chris's consulting room.